Digustingly Beautiful

Forbidden - Tabitha Suzuma

3.5 Stars

“You can close your eyes to the things you do not want to see, but you cannot close your heart to the things you do not want to feel."


I'm disgusted by anything to do with incest. Flowers in the Attic? yuck. Game of Thrones? Double yuck. Just the thought of a brother and a sister getting down n' dirty just makes me wanna barf. Even cousins getting together is gross. If I had a brother I would NEVER be like Never! Not even if my crazy mom locked my non existent brother and I in the attic for a year and the only person I communicated with was him. Not happening. Nuh uh!

I honestly think the main reason why this doesn't get a full four stars from me is the fact that I didn't feel emotionally connected to Lochan and Maya's relationship. It wasn't just because they are related(that's a big reason though), it was also because I was sick of them going back and forth with their feelings. One page they would be like 'We can be together, we can make it work.' Then not even three pages later, 'What the hell are we doing? This isn't right. We gotta stop.' I understand they are confused about how they feel about each other, but this constantly happened throughout the whole book! It annoyed the hell outa me.

Although I didn't feel emotionally connected to Maya and Lochan's relationship, I did care for them as characters. They go through hell! I can't believe the mother let things get that bad for her children! I swear some people should not have kids. What Lochan, Maya, Kit, Tiffin, and Willa go through is just awful. No kids should have to go through that. I hope that mother blames herself for what happened for the rest of her miserable life. ><

And poor Lochan! All the pain he went through at the beginning of the book broke me. I can relate to him. I'm somewhat socially awkward. I don't like talking to people in real life. I avoid it if I can. I'm not as bad as he is, but sometimes I have trouble looking people in the eyes and usually mumble my replies. In school I never raised my hand to answer questions and usually just stared down at my desk. Just like Lochan, I stutter sometimes if I have to talk to people in public. Especially if I don't know the person. I'm ok with family and friends, but if someone starts chatting with me I will most likely mumble and not talk a lot. And the thing is I don't want to be this way. I want to be able to talk to people comfortably and be social. It's just something I gotta work on. SO whenever Lochan had anxiety attacks my heart broke for him. Even though his POV was a little awkward at times(the hard on he got during the dancing with Maya was especially awkward!) I still felt bad for him. I just wanted to cuddle with him and tell him everything will be ok.

Ok, enough with the negatives!

This book, even though it's flooded with incest, is a beautifully written book. There's no doubt about that.

“This whole time, my whole life, that harsh, stony path was leading up to this one point. I followed it blindly, stumbling along the way, scraped and weary, without any idea of where it was leading, without ever realizing that with every step I was approaching the light at the end of a very long, dark tunnel. And now that I've reached it, now that I'm here, I want to catch it in my hand, hold onto it forever to look back on - the point at which my new life really began.”

Sure, even the beautiful writing didn't make me forget that they are bro and sis like most people did, but I did end up loving the writing. Damn this lady can write! The non incest parts were written like poetry. Just so smooth and flowing. I will definitely be reading more of her books that's for sure!

I do have to give props to Tabitha Suzuma for writing a YA book with a challenging subject. Not a lot of people can pull it off, but I think she definitely did. I also love how she didn't romanticize the idea of incest. It happened and Maya and Lochan knew that what they were doing was wrong but couldn't do anything about the feelings they have for each other. If she romanticized the idea of incest that would have been a whole other issue and I have a feeling a lot of people who read this book wouldn't have loved it if she went that route. So kudos to you, Tabitha!

I think I'm the only person who didn't cry or be sad at the end of the book because (view spoiler)[Lochan killed himself (hide spoiler)] . *checks friend's reviews* Yup, I'm basically the only person. Damn. My problem with the ending was that it was too predictable. I saw it coming once they had sex. I just knew something awful was going to happen. I was expecting to be like

I did not shed a single tear. I must be a heartless bitch. :/ I think it would have been sadder if (view spoiler)[Maya had killed herself then Lochan would have to live with that in prison. (hide spoiler)] Then the younger kids wouldn't have had anyone. If that would have happened I would be bawling like a baby.

I'm glad I gave this book a chance, but I think I'm done with incest books. I'll stick with my teacher/student relationships as my taboo reading choice. I will however, read her other book Hurt. I want to read more of her gorgeous writing!